Have you ever been in the movies and had some real annoying things happen and you was like, “Man this sucks! I paid my money to go to the movies and…..happen and now I feel I didn’t get the experience I should have gotten.”
Well here’s some tips to help minimize the hazards when it comes to going to the movies! These maybe jokes, but these things really happen to people. Share with me how your movie experience was like and I will definitely make it a tip!
Tips to going to the movie!
1.Make sure you leave the kids at home-Nothing ruins the movies like screaming kids who want to go to the bathroom every five minutes.
2. Make sure you save enough money for popcorn and soda-Nothing ruins the movies like hearing the crunch of a potato chip bag and the crack and pop of a soda can while you’re trying to enjoy the movie. Cutting cost is annoying!
3. Make sure you get some sleep-Nothing ruins the movies like hearing the fat man in the back row cut logs and call the cows home while you’re trying to hear lines in the movies. Sorry, snooze-fest is not playing in this theater.
4.Make sure you turn your cell phone off-Nothing ruins the movies like hearing stupid ring tones, and loud conversations while you’re watching the movie. Tell Bookie and them to call you later!
5.Make sure you get their early to get a good seat. Nothing ruins the movies like trying to look over Shaq’s baby twin head while you’re trying to watch the movie. We can’t see over your melon head man!
6. Make sure you leave the video cameras home! Nothing ruins the movies like trying to have some bootlegger trying to make a $5.00 film at your expense. Give it up man, bootleg is a crappy and we can’t see it anyway!
7.Make sure you take a poopie before you come in the movie theater. Nothing ruins the movies like some over-fed fat boy stinking up the room with hissilent killers gagging me in the face while I’m trying to enjoy the movie! So serious dude you need an enema.
8.Make sure if you sit on the theater balcony that you space your chairs out or keep your feet on the floor. Nothing ruins the movies like some idiot putting his stinky feet on the back of my chair or kicking the back of my seat when he rocks back in forth. For real! This is not kindergarten man, and for the love of God please wash your feet!
9.Bring enough money for refills for popcorn and soda. Nothing ruins the movies like sharing popcorn or soda and the other person your with eats all the popcorn and drinks all the soda,but never has enough money for the refill. Cheap freeloaders never get asked back on a second date!
10. The Golden Rule Of Going To The Movies-Never, ever; scream like a girl (if you’re a dude), talk/yell, or be obnoxious. Nothing ruins the movies like some obnoxious guy/girl who’s so loud that Helen Keller starts to twitch. You were not mean to watch movies, you are meant to be in movies! Got an agent? Call Me.
Bonus Rule
I had to add this rule because I just experienced it while going to the movies and I thought is was ultra annoying.
11. When you go to the movies leave the cud at home. Nothing ruins a movie like having a cow chew cud/aka “Gum,” in your hear while you’re trying to watch the movie. Close your trap I don’t need to hear your Itunes in popping gum remixes.
If you have a movie tip please let us know and we will make it into a joke. Thanks for reading.
Talia Moore
DT Productions
